Movement

Every few months or so I take a look at my life and take inventory. There's not really a set time table or set content. Just whenever I sense that life has taken a turn or a shift is occurring or maybe I think something is missing or confused. I think now, almost three months since my move back to grand rapids took place, is a good time.

Youth Stuff
I, being me, am back to mentoring students here in the great grand rapids. I love it. Today I oozed over one of my girl's senior photos. No seriously. Last time I checked, she was 15. I also accompanied her to the Dr and experienced her first, very graceful, reaction to the news that she broke her elbow and would be sitting the majority of the season out. Then I listened. And fed her pizza and ice cream. And gave her a present. Hey, it's not a healed elbow, but it's the best I've got.

Also, I'm getting ready (or, shall I say, I've BEGUN) to serve with fifty6. Tonight we basically tried to remember that there is no box. Except for me; I was stuck in a narrative box. Stories stories stories. Gosh, you'd think I was a writer, or something...

Theology Stuff
Significant change here. Much to the dismay of my five point tulip friend (bossardet), I am no longer a "flaming pentecostal" as I was lovingly titled my first year at CU. I am now, what one might call a "conservative continuist" who loves liberty, literegy, and does her best to live out redemption in the divine daily, giving it hands and feet (also known as the social gospel??)

I'm also learning a lot (and loving!) about narrative theology and seriously... it rocks my world...

And, for the first time ever, I am articulating my own beliefs on the end times and death and the new heavens new earth. N.T. Wright is helping a bit. It's the first perspective that actually makes sense to me. No joke guys, up until now, I've avoided making any type of decision on this stuff...


Disciplines
Writing- Although I really do see myself as a creative person and a writer, I'm still figuring out what rhythm works for me.

Sabbath- Is key to my existence. It's like restoring shalom. I love that on Sunday it is the pace of the home I live in.

Prayer- I've yet to begin the fixed-hour prayer that some of you enjoy, but I find that prayer comes most natural for me in freedom. Like breathing, wandering thoughts, nature.

Tithing- A subject of great controversy. For several (about 4 now) years, when I tithe, I usually give directly to someone in need that I know of. This practice was born out of a frustration with my church at the time. I'd see and know of... and know leaders knew of... real, tangible needs in our community that weren't being met. So I decided to give my tithe to people I knew to help ease their burden. It's something I still, to this day, practice. Occasionally I give to the church I gather at every Sunday, but mostly it's individual people. (these are people I know arent going to go spend it on alcohol or pizza or something like that)

creativity- does that count? let's say it does. well, I write. and the city squirrels are a constant source of material for me (there's one that consistantly drops things like apple cores on vinny. seriously.)

-I cant remember the other disciplines right now. Im only up because I cant sleep. (ha! go figure...)


God Stuff
I am learning just how valuable I am. I was reflecting tonight on some horrible things that have been said about me. It can be hard to know what has real grounds and what doesn't. Sometimes well-meaning people say and do hurtful things because they feel it is what needs to be said, etc. And I have to admit, it's easy to let those words be what defines me. But truth is something else entirely. Everyone everywhere is walking around with wounds. Everyone struggles, everyone fights to find freedom in one area or another. And sometimes, well-meaning people with wounds see things distortedly because of that wound (I know I have done this and will do this) and they wound us (wow... the falleness factor)... but the amazing thing is this: we don't have to live under labels and wounds and fears. And I am learning to let the judgments and labels lay where they may and move on. One of my primary responsibilities is to live authentically who I am. To discover and live it out with confidence.

And there's lots more to this section. But not that I can articulate.

Adulthood
I have a job! And I am job hunting. For a real job. ('cause the one I have is fake, you know...)
Next month is my birthday. I would like books. food. and these.
I'm living in community with some super-sweet people. Including this future presbyterian pastor ;-)


Social
I don't really have a social life. Not really. It's one area that really needs some development.
But I think that it will come, in time. I'm not all that concerned, really.

Books
I am STILL reading Zen and the art... as well as Surprised by Hope.
Next? Well, I was hoping something fun/funny. Let me know if you have recommendations.