Soul Sisters and Tears

What's up with all the pics of Lindsey? Well, she's my soul-sister; we are twins separated by parents. And she's moving to San Diego, CA in just two weeks and two days. I am so proud of her. I've done the cross-country move thing; it's not easy, and it takes a lot of courage. But selfishly, I wish she'd stay with me! We're always dreaming up things or working on projects together. She's currently the only avenue I have to be a creative mind in my church. (I'm working on trying to convince people in positions that matter that I am an intensely creative individual who simply needs some training in areas like video production. In time, in time.) In short: I'm going to bawl when I have to say good-bye and a large part of me will be in San Diego, with her! (Though not the part that would enable me to move with her!)

Also, me writing about her move is part of me prepping myself for this huge change. Not only is she my P.I.C., she is also, quite possibly, the only strong, intimate friend I have in T.C. that's a Christian because as I have this funky knack for connecting with non-Christians. Her move will be a challenging transition for us both, though undoubtedly more for her. At least she knows that if it doesn't work out she's got a friend who's back here in TC who knows what that's like, too, and will love on her as much as possible.

All this to say, if you're sick of hearing about her now, you'll be even more sick of it in two weeks. You'll have to simply deal or not come to my blog for a few days. And no, I don't apologize. So :-p.

On that note: at some point in the next 40 days I'll be silent on here for about two weeks. This is preplanned, and you should assume I'm alive and healthy. Every year we do a church-wide fast from several things, one being non-essential media (like blogging!). You're welcome to join me or simply pray for me during this time. I don't have the dates with me. On to some more intimate thoughts for the day.

The strangest thing has happened to me the past couple weeks at church. I've cried. And it's not some over-emotional experience or some preplanned manipulation... it's one of those cries that arises out of a realization that goes to the depth of the soul. Today it happened as I was singing a song, seated in the pew. I was singing something about God being my strength
and protector from things like fire and waters (which we can use as a metaphor for crap and malice in life). And I couldn't finish the sentence. My soul cried out and despite my highly developed skill of not crying when I don't want to, down came the tears. Talk about embarrassing! But I'm glad in a way, too. It helped me to realize that God wants to be there for me and that I'm tired and worn because I'm not resting in prayer, or doing any of those other fun-weird-mysterious disciplines that help the soul rest, nearly enough.

In short, I'ma growin' and a-learnin'. And also learning, again, that tears are okay and that I am not superwoman. How many times will I go around this mountain? Well, if you look at it like a hike through the woods, you don't have to worry about the mountain. So, I'll just keep moving forward, learning to love and dream along this journey.

Peace,

Asher